Reader's Guide

By Minnesota Historical Society Press

Dear Jacob Readers Guide
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Although the 1989 kidnapping of Jacob Wetterling and the following search for answers has been widely covered by news media, before the publication of Dear Jacob: A Mother’s Journey of Hope, most readers may have known only some details about the case, many of which came from secondary sources. With the publication of this memoir in 2023, readers for the first time heard the whole story from the Wetterling family’s perspective, and in Patty’s own words.

This case, and Patty’s activism and advocacy, truly have changed the way parents and elders safeguard children, including through the passage of laws, the improvement of organizational practices, and greater cultural awareness. Thanks to the book, which appeared on national and regional bestseller lists and is now available in paperback, a new generation has learned the moving story of a tragic crime involving an ordinary family in an ordinary small town and a mother’s extraordinary and heroic responses that have affected the lives of millions.

The memoir covers not only the circumstances of the crime and the prolonged investigation that followed, but also the ways the family coped with grief and, thankfully, managed to carry on with their lives, celebrating personal milestones, noting professional achievements, and treasuring relationships. It includes the story of a remarkable friendship between two women, the coauthors of this book, and how their efforts instigated resolution for Jacob’s case and several others. It describes the ways Patty lobbied for change, including her work with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, her training efforts with law enforcement, and her runs for office. And it provides details of the sensitive and intense legal negotiations that ultimately brought justice.


Book Clubs

We are visiting book clubs and discussing Dear Jacob: A Mother’s Journey of Hope on Zoom! In return, we ask that your book club make a donation of any amount to the Jacob Wetterling Resource Center. Message us for details. We look forward to sharing Dear Jacob with you!


The following are questions to help guide discussions of the book:

  1. Prior to reading, were you acquainted with this story? If so, which aspects were familiar? How has the book changed your understanding of them?

  2. What details of any parts of the story surprised you? What new elements did you learn about because of the book?

  3. Describe the family’s relationship with the media before, during, and after the crime. How did they adjust their approach as time went on?

  4. Soon after the crime, articles ran in such publications as the New York Times and People magazine; the governor of Minnesota sent National Guard troops to assist in the search; and businesses and individuals joined together to distribute flyers. Why do you think the public responded so strongly? Which responses in particular does Patty note as personally comforting?

  5. What stands out to you about the investigation? Why did it take so long to find answers? Why do you think the Paynesville incidents were largely overlooked by investigators?

  6. How would you describe the attitude toward law enforcement as portrayed in the book? What difficult factors did the family need to consider on this topic as the investigation moved forward?

  7. Describe how the text captures the stages of friendship that developed between Patty and Joy. What emotions were both women feeling and why? How did they reach an understanding?

  8. The paperback includes a new afterword written by Joy Baker, from her first-person perspective. What does it add to your understanding of her friendship with Patty Wetterling? What was their writing process like? How did the astonishing resolution of the case affect the process of creating the book and promoting it after publication?

  9. What passages of the text did you find especially moving?

  10. “True Crime” is a popular category for books, podcasts, series, and movies. How do you feel about the genre? Do you think True Crime in general has more potential to help or hurt investigations? Would you consider this book an example of the genre? Why or why not?

  11. Much has changed in science and technology since 1989. How did technological advances help solve this case?

  12. What contemporary cases are you aware of that may be viewed as similar to this one? Considering the advances in science as well as policy, what has changed in the ability to address them? What do you think still needs to be changed?

  13. What do you admire about Patty’s story? How do you imagine you might have reacted at various points if you were in her place? What lessons do you take away from this book?

  14. In her talks on child safety, Patty often says, “scared kids are not safer kids.” How has parenting and childcare changed since the 1980s? What precautions do we now have in place that we didn’t have back then? How can we talk to kids about staying safe without scaring them?

Visit these links for more helpful tips on how to empower kids to be “Smart, not scared”

Jacob Wetterling Resource Center
https://zeroabuseproject.org/victim-assistance/jwrc/

National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
https://www.missingkids.org


Copyright 2025. This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. Readers who follow the conditions described at that link may use the text without requesting permission or paying fees.

Published by Minnesota Historical Society Press
$22.95 paperback, 354 pages